putting up a nerf ball basket in my living room.

teaching myself how to juggle.

whether we’ll all wind up conditioning ourselves to wash our hands whenever we sing happy birthday, as opposed to the other way around.

whether there’s any reason to check my mail.

whether I should represent my neighborhood in the upcoming Hunger Games, senior edition.

calling people I don’t even like.

how many people will get infected carrying the Olympic Torch.

pretending it’s all only a movie, which reminds me that it’s time to look for the closest drive-in theater.

whether I should trust the guy selling coronavirus test kits out of the back of his van across the street.

using old socks as gloves.

starting to bet on the weather, the only action Las Vegas is still hosting.

rewriting the lyrics to South Park’s Blame Canada to Blame China.

throwing out everything I own, except what I need for juggling, so that I don’t have to worry about disinfecting it.

setting my alarm clock for June.