Thirty-four years ago I took an in-person test for Jeopardy at their studio in Burbank. The process was simpler then. All you had to do was ask to take the test and then show up – I’m good at showing up. There was less to know, and less competition (just nerds waiting in line cramming with index cards and excitedly reminiscing about past episodes). But I still wasn’t good enough to get on the show, though I did get invited to a party in Malibu by one of the other hopefuls who didn’t make it.

Nevertheless, for the last 16 years, with no expectations and for no good reason, other than challenging my diminishing memory, slow typing skills, and ignorance of current events, I have taken the annual online screening test.

Then, newsflash, I got an email last week saying that I had qualified for the second round of testing, on Zoom (so they can watch to see if you have 12 people in the room helping you cheat).

This figured to be ugly. I have no knowledge about the last 30 plus years on almost any topic they might ask about, and it’s too late to start studying the almanac again, like I used to do in class, when I went, on my way to participating in an intercollegiate trivia bowl.

But, I figured, what the heck, grist for the mill, something to write about in my blog. So, in preparation for the big day, just as Bobby Fischer famously played tennis on off days during his World Championship match with Boris Spassky, I watched Wimbledon on tv.

As it turned out, out of the 50 questions, there were only two or three where I knew the answer but couldn’t remember it until too late (one of them embarrassingly). There were a couple other questions I should have known, but they were geography related, and who knows anything about that these days without their GPS in hand. The other likely misses just weren’t in what remains of my wheelhouse.

Still, who knows. Maybe a couple of my random guesses will turn out to be correct, or my deer in the headlights look will appeal to them. I’ll hear back from them within a year, or not, or maybe I’ll get invited to another party. That would be a win.