The Man in the Iron Mask

Now that the CDC has recommended wearing masks, and a shortage of same still exists, people are getting very creative in making their own. I didn’t want to get too close to get a better look, but today I thought I saw someone wearing one that was either a strip steak or a dead pigeon.

Major league baseball, intent on having a season, has announced that catchers’ masks have been proven to block the passage of baseballs, and therefore should have no trouble stopping a one-micron virus.

I have heard rumors, not only of an in-the-works mask-making competition television show brought to you by the same people who produce Iron Chef, but also that there will be a flood of participants using mask-making as their talent in the next Miss America pageant.

With everyone wearing masks, serious discussions also are underway to have Halloween and Mardi Gras differentiate themselves by being the only two days each year when no one wears one.